not so fast ...

[susandennis]

I worked for this woman from about 2001 until about 2003.  I liked her a lot.  I liked her style.  I learned a lot from her.  She was a great boss except for two fatal flaws.

1.  She loved me and my work but there was something about me that she didn't like and she never could articulate what it was or help me fix it or even identify it and so finally she kind of fired me for it.  She arranged the firing so it was a lay off but I knew the truth.
2.  She had me, under the table, doing work for her husband who was (and probably still is) a fool and not a grateful one.  She asked me if I would do it but she asked me in such a way that gave me no way to say 'no thank you' gracefully.  In other words it was kind of 'other duties as assigned' added onto my real job.  And I did not appreciate it one single bit.

I have not seen her since the day I left the company.  The only time I have heard from her was when she left about 3 years later, I got the 'I'm moving on' email. 

Today I get an email invitation from her to join her 'professional network' on LinkedIn.  I did but I'm not happy about it.  The site gives me the creeps.  I'm not usually twitchy about giving out personal information.  I do it a lot.  I'm prime google fodder.   But something about this LinkedIn thing feels hinky.  Or maybe it's just that it came from her.

Comments

[unzeugmatic.livejournal.com]

I worked for this woman from about 2001 until about 2003.

A really really superquick scanning of my Friends page out of the side of my eyes transmitted this into my head as: I worked for this woman who weighed about 2001 or about 2003.

I know it's an absurd stretch -- I just caught a few words and my end-of-day mind filled them in -- but I couldn't wait for the story that would follow!

[susandennis]

With the userpic to match! This just made my day!

[howeird]

That was kilos, right?

[dizzdvl.livejournal.com]

You know the exercising thing was throwing me off, but seriously the doing something that makes you feel creepy for someone you don't like is BAFFLING.

Pretend it is your sister and just delete the information you put in. :)

[susandennis]

No, no that's the killer, I do like her! And one of the things that I learned from her was how to really effectively use your network of friends and acquaintences. I knew the value of that before, of course, but she really did it beautifully with spectacular results for everyone involved. I can't figure out why I am not that comfortable with this thing.

i think ...

[henare.livejournal.com]

it's a sort of uncomfortable blending of "work" and "not work." my linkedin network has a really mixed up combo of computing pioneers and pornographers, serial entrepreneurs (read: management failures) and past acquaintances.

Re: i think ...

[susandennis]

So you're linked? And it's ok? I mean nothing horrible happened to you? I have no clue what I even mean and I'm really kind of perplexed as to why I'm even stressing about this at all. Not like me!

Re: i think ...

[henare.livejournal.com]

nothing bad has happened. i have, however, found lots of people from my past that i don't mind being linked to, and i've done exactly that. i login about once/week or so to see if anything new is going on.

you can see my linked in stuff here (http://www.linkedin.com/in/henare)

Re: i think ...

[susandennis]

Thank you! That's really good to know. I feel better about the whole thing now. Thank you!

Re: i think ...

[henare.livejournal.com]

yah. it's not bad at all.

a few years ago there was a site called sixdegrees.com ... now that was kinda cool and kinda scary all at once. their stated goal was to map everyone's connections N levels deep (they'd show you six levels, of course, as soon as their database technology could keep up). now, all these other sites like linkedin, myspace, orkut, ... can all do something similar but it's not the reason they exist.

i only do linkedin with people i "know" for the most part. i'm linkedin with vasilatos (with whom i worked 20 years ago), and at least a few other lj people. i think this may be the key to making this less creepy--others have asked to join my list but i turn them down. this is definitely something that could be beneficial for a slimy recruiter (many recruiters are good, but many more seem to be slimy).

Re: i think ...

[fj.livejournal.com]

It's how I keep in touch with colleagues whom I like but am not really 'friends' with. I haven't gotten a job or intro through it yet, but have come close.

[dizzdvl.livejournal.com]

Ooooh see I was cornfuzzled.

That's standard operating procedure for me, btw :)

[geordie.livejournal.com]

So... wydja do it? If my ex boss invited me I'd develop selective blindness where his email is concerned.

[susandennis]

Oh I joined. I have worked for a few ex bosses who's email I'd report as spam but they wouldn't be sending me email anyway!

[vasilatos]

I've been linkedIn a few times, no biggie.

I'm linked in

[vixter.livejournal.com]

A few people have ignored my invitations. Oh well. I don't mind. I'm not going to pester them over it.

A guy who used to work for me wrote me a really nice recommendation. Unsolicited. And a headhunter called me just last week.

And best of all, through LinkedIn I found my friend Brenda whom I had lost contact with when I left Oregon.

Re: I'm linked in

[susandennis]

Interesting... Thanks. I do feel better about it. Maybe I'll just flush out my entry and forget about it.

[howeird]

I joined Linkedin as a charter member because the founder gave a presentation to a monthly tech meeting I go to. I didn't do anything more than put basic info in there. Several months later I start getting invites from all kinds of people I used to work with, as well as recruiters who had found me interviews in the past.

Any time someone invites me whom I am not 100% comfortable with sharing my info with, I say no. Did that today, inc fact. An executive search bozo who somehow thinks I might know anyone who would want to manage a company.

It's helped keep me in touch with a lot of people I'd lost track of. All in all I think it's a good thing. You just need to say "no" sometimes. Just like in life.