The future of my stuff
Oct. 11th, 2004 07:39 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
susandennisWell, not my stuff... my Mom's stuff.
My mother's father had a sister - Fanny. Ok, we'll pause here for the giggles. Aunt Fanny was a piece of work outside her name. Aren't you finished giggling yet? Ok, so will it help if I tell you that the name her husband when by from the time he was 4 until he died at age 85 was Trigger or Trig. Yep, Aunt Fanny and Uncle Trig. Not making this up. But, it will not surprise you to learn the were in the Texas branch of the family.
Ok, back on track here. Fanny and Trig had no kids (sometimes god's ways aren't so mysterious). And they had a lot of stuff. At some point Fanny decided to devote her remaining years to the future dispensation of that stuff. Keep in mind she had no intention of any of it leaving her possession while she still had a breath. And, you should also know, that all of it - every single thing - was old lady stuff. I mean the cost of having someone haul it off was the real life concern here.
About every couple of months Mom would get a letter from Fanny about her stuff. She would ask Mom for a list of the stuff she wanted (of Fanny's) and include a list of what the other nieces and nephews had claimed so far. If Mom did not respond immediately Fanny would call Long Distance. Person to Person. (I do believe that Fanny may well have made the last Person to Person call in the U.S.) Keep in mind, at this stage in her life, Mom had grown children, two houses full of lovely things of her own and lived 1,500 miles from Fanny.
The trick with Aunt Fanny was - there were only wrong answers.
If Mom indicated an item that she wanted, Fanny would then launch into why another niece or nephew deserved that item more. And there was nothing - absolutely nothing - more insulting and offensive to Aunt Fanny than to tell her you didn't want any of her shit.
What To Do About Fanny's Things was a a family joke.
And now, Mom has turned into Aunt Fanny. She had Polly call all three of us this weekend and request a list of the stuff we wanted. My brother has already taken what he wanted (Dad's jewelery and the booze from the kitchen). All I want is Mom to get all settled in and the apartment to be emptied. My sister would love to have every single thing shipped to her (at Mother's expense).
Mom started in about the stuff this morning. She is getting whiny about all the stuff my sister wants. I think she's pretty insulted that I don't want anything and she's a little annoyed that I told Bill to take the booze last weekend.
I think I've hit another patch of Low Mom Patience. I want this all to be over with. I'm tired of fucking with it. And I want my sister to vaporize. Now. Please.
But, to close of the story of Aunt Fanny and Uncle Trig.... When they finally did die - within weeks of each other, someone sent Mom some stuff - a really ugly lamp and some other stuff that my sister grabbed up gleefully. And she left my Mom some cash. My sister tried hard to get Mom to donate the money to starving children in Africa or something but Mom held strong.
She took Aunt Fanny's cash and donated it to a plastic surgeon in return for a face lift.
My mother's father had a sister - Fanny. Ok, we'll pause here for the giggles. Aunt Fanny was a piece of work outside her name. Aren't you finished giggling yet? Ok, so will it help if I tell you that the name her husband when by from the time he was 4 until he died at age 85 was Trigger or Trig. Yep, Aunt Fanny and Uncle Trig. Not making this up. But, it will not surprise you to learn the were in the Texas branch of the family.
Ok, back on track here. Fanny and Trig had no kids (sometimes god's ways aren't so mysterious). And they had a lot of stuff. At some point Fanny decided to devote her remaining years to the future dispensation of that stuff. Keep in mind she had no intention of any of it leaving her possession while she still had a breath. And, you should also know, that all of it - every single thing - was old lady stuff. I mean the cost of having someone haul it off was the real life concern here.
About every couple of months Mom would get a letter from Fanny about her stuff. She would ask Mom for a list of the stuff she wanted (of Fanny's) and include a list of what the other nieces and nephews had claimed so far. If Mom did not respond immediately Fanny would call Long Distance. Person to Person. (I do believe that Fanny may well have made the last Person to Person call in the U.S.) Keep in mind, at this stage in her life, Mom had grown children, two houses full of lovely things of her own and lived 1,500 miles from Fanny.
The trick with Aunt Fanny was - there were only wrong answers.
If Mom indicated an item that she wanted, Fanny would then launch into why another niece or nephew deserved that item more. And there was nothing - absolutely nothing - more insulting and offensive to Aunt Fanny than to tell her you didn't want any of her shit.
What To Do About Fanny's Things was a a family joke.
And now, Mom has turned into Aunt Fanny. She had Polly call all three of us this weekend and request a list of the stuff we wanted. My brother has already taken what he wanted (Dad's jewelery and the booze from the kitchen). All I want is Mom to get all settled in and the apartment to be emptied. My sister would love to have every single thing shipped to her (at Mother's expense).
Mom started in about the stuff this morning. She is getting whiny about all the stuff my sister wants. I think she's pretty insulted that I don't want anything and she's a little annoyed that I told Bill to take the booze last weekend.
I think I've hit another patch of Low Mom Patience. I want this all to be over with. I'm tired of fucking with it. And I want my sister to vaporize. Now. Please.
But, to close of the story of Aunt Fanny and Uncle Trig.... When they finally did die - within weeks of each other, someone sent Mom some stuff - a really ugly lamp and some other stuff that my sister grabbed up gleefully. And she left my Mom some cash. My sister tried hard to get Mom to donate the money to starving children in Africa or something but Mom held strong.
She took Aunt Fanny's cash and donated it to a plastic surgeon in return for a face lift.
