![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
susandennisI am a blogaholic. Well, not really just blogs... journals and forums and discussion groups, too. I don't mind real people. On most weekdays from 5:30 a.m. until 4 p.m. I have plenty of face to face kind of people at my beck and call. The rest of the time, my world is pretty fleshless. But, it is always always filled with people who come to me via 1s and 0s.
I finally got the courage to move out of my marriage in the early 80's. I bought a tiny little condo and a single sized water bed and snuggled in for some much needed 'me' time. I also bought a computer. And a modem. And started the rest of my life.
In the early days it was electronic bulletin boards. I could log on and join into discussions anytime of the day or night in my jammies or naked. I didn't have to clean the house or cook or serve. These friends were just happy to hear my thoughts and ideas. I was hooked and it's only gotten better.
Today, my life is more rich than I could have ever possibly imagined. I still don't have to shower, cook or clean if I don't want to and yet, I have friends near and far that I'm in contact with every day - a bazillion times a day. And I get to read their thoughts and ideas - what pisses them off, what brings them joy, what questions they have, their experiences with things I know about... Some of these people - like my LJ friends - I interact with. Some of them share themselves with me anonymously. Some only through email. Some live across town. Some live in countries I will never see. Some live whole days away (and, yep, I remembered to send Scott his birthday email!). A couple of these friends I have known for years and never met.
There's one journal that I have been reading continuously since the day she she first started it 10 years ago. She lives in Kansas and I have never met her and it's likely that even if I did, we wouldn't particularly care for each other. In 10 years we've probably swapped 3, maybe 4 emails. But reading her online journal gives me a peep into a different life. I learn so much from how she thinks about things, how she questions things, how she moves through her life.
Another electronic friend, from Rhode Island, I met way back in the Prodigy days. We found each other in the 'traveling to New Zealand' discussion group in the early 90's. I went to New Zealand and told him all about it and helped him plan his trip. The week they were due to leave, I sent the 'bon voyage' email. I was curious about why he didn't send a reply but figured he got busy packing and leaving. And then, a week later, I got a snail mail from his daughter saying that the night before they were to leave, his house had burned to the ground. His wife was in the hospital and he wanted me to know that's why he hadn't written and he'd write as soon as he could. They recovered and rebuilt and did get to go to New Zealand and one of the pictures from their trip hangs in my house today. About 10 years ago he and his wife came to Seattle and we all went to a Red Sox/Mariners game. It was fabulous. I haven't heard from him in a while. Need to drop him a note and catch up.
Today my addiction is as strong as ever. Blogs have taken my rich world and put frosting all over it. Daily I read about the lives of a tv cameraman, a father who's premature baby's life is documented day after day, politics from all angles - personal and not, regular people and irregular people. I know them all better than I know most people I see face to face. I treasure them all and find new ones every day.
I have made purchases based on the discussion forum factor and likely will do even more of that. I love reading about people's experiences with the same goods and services that I interact with every day. I read three Roomba forums and I know that my own Roomba will work better and live longer because of the info I've picked up there. Ditto with TiVo. Ditto with Treo.
I got into a discussion the other day with someone - face to face. She said that unless she actually met someone face to face she didn't really think of them as real people. ??!! "People online can make themselves be anything they want." And people face to face can't? Don't? Stick your nose in my cup, honey, can you wake up and smell the coffee?
Even my 82 year old Mom gets it. I heard her telling Libba once that my computer 'gives her really good friends all over the world!'
Oh crap, I've totally forgotten my point. Oh yes, Six Degrees of Separation. I've noticed lately that the giant sized world of blogs and forums and journals is not, maybe, as giant as it seems. Today, three of my readings - totally unrelated to each other in any other way - talked about the same book. Thud. This is not even a book I would be mildly interested in but three of my 'friends' are. I think that's cool. When two of my blog/journal writers (that I did not discover from each other) turn out to know one another, it always tickles me. And that happened twice this week as I read about their visits with each other.
Most blogs, like LJs, have a list of people who's blogs or journals they keep up with. So counting those lists in my Six Degrees wouldn't be fair. It's the non listed encounters that tell me, there's not so much difference between the flesh experience and the 1s and 0s.
I finally got the courage to move out of my marriage in the early 80's. I bought a tiny little condo and a single sized water bed and snuggled in for some much needed 'me' time. I also bought a computer. And a modem. And started the rest of my life.
In the early days it was electronic bulletin boards. I could log on and join into discussions anytime of the day or night in my jammies or naked. I didn't have to clean the house or cook or serve. These friends were just happy to hear my thoughts and ideas. I was hooked and it's only gotten better.
Today, my life is more rich than I could have ever possibly imagined. I still don't have to shower, cook or clean if I don't want to and yet, I have friends near and far that I'm in contact with every day - a bazillion times a day. And I get to read their thoughts and ideas - what pisses them off, what brings them joy, what questions they have, their experiences with things I know about... Some of these people - like my LJ friends - I interact with. Some of them share themselves with me anonymously. Some only through email. Some live across town. Some live in countries I will never see. Some live whole days away (and, yep, I remembered to send Scott his birthday email!). A couple of these friends I have known for years and never met.
There's one journal that I have been reading continuously since the day she she first started it 10 years ago. She lives in Kansas and I have never met her and it's likely that even if I did, we wouldn't particularly care for each other. In 10 years we've probably swapped 3, maybe 4 emails. But reading her online journal gives me a peep into a different life. I learn so much from how she thinks about things, how she questions things, how she moves through her life.
Another electronic friend, from Rhode Island, I met way back in the Prodigy days. We found each other in the 'traveling to New Zealand' discussion group in the early 90's. I went to New Zealand and told him all about it and helped him plan his trip. The week they were due to leave, I sent the 'bon voyage' email. I was curious about why he didn't send a reply but figured he got busy packing and leaving. And then, a week later, I got a snail mail from his daughter saying that the night before they were to leave, his house had burned to the ground. His wife was in the hospital and he wanted me to know that's why he hadn't written and he'd write as soon as he could. They recovered and rebuilt and did get to go to New Zealand and one of the pictures from their trip hangs in my house today. About 10 years ago he and his wife came to Seattle and we all went to a Red Sox/Mariners game. It was fabulous. I haven't heard from him in a while. Need to drop him a note and catch up.
Today my addiction is as strong as ever. Blogs have taken my rich world and put frosting all over it. Daily I read about the lives of a tv cameraman, a father who's premature baby's life is documented day after day, politics from all angles - personal and not, regular people and irregular people. I know them all better than I know most people I see face to face. I treasure them all and find new ones every day.
I have made purchases based on the discussion forum factor and likely will do even more of that. I love reading about people's experiences with the same goods and services that I interact with every day. I read three Roomba forums and I know that my own Roomba will work better and live longer because of the info I've picked up there. Ditto with TiVo. Ditto with Treo.
I got into a discussion the other day with someone - face to face. She said that unless she actually met someone face to face she didn't really think of them as real people. ??!! "People online can make themselves be anything they want." And people face to face can't? Don't? Stick your nose in my cup, honey, can you wake up and smell the coffee?
Even my 82 year old Mom gets it. I heard her telling Libba once that my computer 'gives her really good friends all over the world!'
Oh crap, I've totally forgotten my point. Oh yes, Six Degrees of Separation. I've noticed lately that the giant sized world of blogs and forums and journals is not, maybe, as giant as it seems. Today, three of my readings - totally unrelated to each other in any other way - talked about the same book. Thud. This is not even a book I would be mildly interested in but three of my 'friends' are. I think that's cool. When two of my blog/journal writers (that I did not discover from each other) turn out to know one another, it always tickles me. And that happened twice this week as I read about their visits with each other.
Most blogs, like LJs, have a list of people who's blogs or journals they keep up with. So counting those lists in my Six Degrees wouldn't be fair. It's the non listed encounters that tell me, there's not so much difference between the flesh experience and the 1s and 0s.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 05:45 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 05:59 pm (UTC)I also monitor
(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 06:48 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 05:59 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 06:03 pm (UTC)but, you do kind of blow my hypothesis... you made me realize that when online moves in across the street, you get delicious treats! This is something that my other online friends are currently not offering...
and then you left me... :(
(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 07:19 pm (UTC).
While I don't disagree that knowing people exclusively online can be a very enriching experience, knowing them fully as individuals, in my opinion, is impossible. People communicate in different ways whether they are writing or they are in person; it kind of just depends on the type of communication you prefer, and the level of closeness you really want with a person.
So, I would call some people I know online but never met an "online friend," but would never consider anyone I had never met in person a "close friend," no matter how long I knew them. Because I believe you need to know someone in more than two dimensions before you can truly know them.
But the beauty of the Internet is the unprecedented level of free exchange of ideas. If there has ever been anything in the history of mankind to create even a semblance of a "global community," the Internet is it. My only point, really, is that in-person vs. online interaction is inherently different, and each has their own positives and negatives.
I certainly think of people online as real people (and if you have half a brain, it doesn't take long to figure out who might be feeding you lines of bullshit about who they are -- even in writing you can generally tell if someone is genuine). I just don't think of them as particularly real relationships. To me, they are literary acquaintances, the next technological step up from pen pals.
.
.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 07:45 pm (UTC)You are right. The interactions are different. Very different. And for me, in my life, I value the on-line ones more than in the in-person ones. I think that's exactly what I was trying to say. Thanks.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 08:24 pm (UTC).
Any time!
For me, it depends on the person. Some people I interact with online, I wouldn't want an in-person relationship with. Others, I prefer having an element of what someone I once knew (with whom I had an, ahem, online falling out) called "meatspace."
I didn't realize until just now, though, as I was writing this, that I don't have any preference for exclusively in-person contact. My two preferences, depending on the person, are either (1) exclusive online interaction, or (2) a healthy mix of both in-person and online interaction. The people I know who prefer the phone (which is sort of in between "in person" and "online") over the Internet, for example, kind of frustrate me.
I think you mentioned recently that you don't care for IM, though. I love it. It's wonderful to me to be able to carry on a real-time conversation, in writing, while at the same time I can belt out singing along to my music. On the other hand, I almost exclusively IM people I also know in person; the online acquaintances aren't people I find interesting enough to hold sustained real-time conversations with them.
Another thing I love about online interaction is the multimedia nature of it -- you can present all manner of combinations of text, graphics, images, and sound. My dad and stepmother complain about the nature of digital photography and the expectation of having people gather around the computer to look at their pictures. So, they literally print out every one of their digital photos onto photo paper and put them into actual photo albums. My perspective is much different, though. Most people I interact with spend sizable portions of their days in front of computers, so it's actually more convenient for the images to be available there (all hail Flickr!).
I think I've gone off on enough tangents for one day -- I guess I'll get back to work now . . .
.
.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 07:46 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 08:11 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 08:28 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 08:48 pm (UTC)Yes, Willa. If found her exactly the same way. Remember when she worked in that horrible law office? Remember her 4,000 year old cat? That is wild.
Amazing. Truly.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 08:56 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 09:09 pm (UTC)One of the few email exchanges we had was over the web job. She kept saying she didn't know enough to get a job using her web skills. I finally wrote and told her she was full of shit. If I could earn a living that way, she sure could.
I stopped reading her for a while because she didn't have an RSS feed I could add to Bloglines and I got lazy. But now she, of course, has a feed for everything so I'm back up to speed.
She was ahead of her time for sure. Wild.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 10:14 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 11:33 pm (UTC)I was fascinated by the varying kinds of people who were willing to share and read my drivel. This is fun.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-15 11:36 pm (UTC)Now, Mom is on the net and the question has gone away. My life would be seriously smaller without the wonderful folks I've met on the net.
(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-16 03:13 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2005-09-16 04:25 am (UTC)