Lying

[susandennis]

I spend most holidays like I spend most days - on my own, entertaining myself, happy and content. I do not go out of my way to find other people to do holiday things with. Just no interest.

However, I will lie about it whenever I want. When people I don't know well ask what I'm doing for Thanksgiving, I tell them I'm spending it with friends. My house cleaner asked me yesterday. Had I told her the truth, she would have felt compelled to invite me to her house. As it was, she felt very good that I was appropriately taken care of by others.

I did the same with the building manager and the very nice clerk at Goodwill yesterday.

On Mother's Day, if I'm out and about, random people will tell me "Happy Mother's Day!". I've never been anyone's mother. But, pointing that out to these people would only make them feel awkward and/or regretful. So I smile and with gratitude for their thoughtfulness say, thank you.

I actually don't really even consider this lying. It's really more common courtesy.

But, meanwhile... I'm trying to be thankful that the gym/pool is open today and not be annoyed that it doesn't open until 8. I'm thinking about actually doing something special after. I'm thinking about taking myself over to 13 Coins for one of their giant bloody marys and a nice brunch. (13 Coins is the fabulous restaurant that is moving to this neighborhood in January.) I might change my mind but that's what I'm thinking now.

I've still got an hour before time to leave for the pool. I'm still in bed. I feel like I should get up and do something productive with this hour but, I think I'll just play a game on my phone instead.

Comments

[nattalie-m.livejournal.com]

I do the same for Christmas when I decide to stay at home. If you tell to others that you will stay alone they feel they have to invite you, and that makes me feel uncomfortable.

btw, do you care if I start reading your journal? :)

[susandennis]

Of course, I don't mind. I'd be delighted!

[nattalie-m.livejournal.com]

Thank you Susan :)

[daphnep.livejournal.com]

A Bloody Mary on thanksgiving sounds like an excellent idea to me.

I do the same thing, with both Thanksgiving (which I prefer to do at home with no guests) and mother’s day.

[lifeinroseland.livejournal.com]

Haha. I've lied too. It is so much easier! Def treat yourself though. God, a Bloody Mary!

[opakele.livejournal.com]

I am with you on lying. One year a woman wished me happy mother's day. I grinned at her and said, 'thanks, but I dodged that bullet...' I realized it sounded crass when it came out of my mouth, but the look on her face cemented it.

I lie like a rug, now.1

[zoefruitcake.livejournal.com]

I agree, it is just nicer to lie to people like that, and nicer to yourself too.
I'm most put out that my gym is closed 3 days for Christmas and 2 for New Year!

[susandennis]

Oh! 3 days at Christmas and 2 for New Year??!!! That's horrible! I was kind of annoyed that my gym closes on Christmas but that's the only day all year long that they are closed so I guess maybe I should just not be annoyed and be grateful!

[missdiane.livejournal.com]

I do the same. This year is an exception where I'll be spending dinner (once I head over with my contributions) with my BFF and her parents. It'll be nice and small and chill and I'll bow out a little after 4 when I go home to feed my kitties. It's been years since I've spent the holidays with anyone and it doesn't bother me to hang out at home. I'll call my parents two states away to wish them well and sometimes I hear from my siblings, sometimes not.

Those and the Mothers Day ones (same deal here) are the kind of lies that are completely acceptable. It avoids an awkward situation on both ends which is the goal anyway.

[rejectomorph]

Wishing a stranger a happy Mother's Day (or Father's Day) is fraught with peril, and I consider it common courtesy not to do it. Not only can I not know if they are in fact parents, but there's always the chance that they are parents who have lost a child, and my well-meant but thoughtless comment could be a cruel reminder.

[roasted-beets.livejournal.com]

My gym was open for one hour 8 to 9 this morning for the Thanksgiving Workout. They collected donations for new toys (equipment) the gym needs. About 35 people showed up. It was wonderful and fun. I was in charge of the music playlist.

I'm the only mother my dog has - if it gets me a free lunch (like it did one year) I'll claim her.

[susandennis]

ARUGH one hour only??? but very cool about collecting donations.

[badrobot68.livejournal.com]

For most of my years in retail, I'd look forward to spending Thanksgiving alone, BY CHOICE, but I couldn't tell anyone that or they would literally drag me out to celebrate at their house. They always thought I was being depressed or feeling sorry for myself, when really it was my only day off from work for the next 5 weeks and I honestly just wanted to be alone and enjoy it. So I would have to make up another story to get out of being invited to people's gatherings.