love language
May. 1st, 2019 08:03 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
susandennisWhen my Dad died, my Mom and I started some rituals. She lived in Charleston, SC and I lived in Seattle. We'd talk on the phone every day and swap emails throughout the day. One of our common bonds was baseball.
Once, when she fell or got sick, I don't remember, but needed extra effort, my sister popped out of the woodwork and decided that she need to talk to Mom's doctor and talk to the retirement home staff and she sent an email out to me and my brother telling us that she was going to 'get to the bottom of this'.
My sister lives (then and now) in a world where she is supreme ruler and dictates all. My brother, was (then and now) always ready to step in when needed but not one to insert himself frivolously.
So one morning on the way to the bus, I read my sister's email which pissed me off no end and then saw a reply to her from my brother which basically said 'BACK THE FUCK OFF and do it now!' Because he is he, it was kind and polite and firm and convincing. He pointed out that since I was there for Mom every single day in a very on point kind of way, her insinuating herself into the situation around me, was unneeded and unwarranted. (She backed the fuck off immediately.)
I appreciated the gesture and the note so very much. But, one part of it is the reason for this entry.
As an example of our connection, he wrote: "She and Mom watch baseball games and then discuss the results every morning in deep conversation about that most boring of all games." (My sister holds herself way above anyone who enjoys professional athletics.)
Cut to this season. His son (a rabid Red Sox fan) and I planned a baseball extravaganza here for my birthday when the Mariners played the Red Sox. My brother came, too and so, came to the games and heard our talk and enjoyed it all.
And, now, stays up late, listening to Mariner games. He even has his favorite player!
And, just like with Mom, baseball has put up well worn footpath of connection between me and my brother and his son. My brother is in Texas, my nephew is in Iowa, I'm still in Seattle. We have different lives and different loves. But we share baseball. We come together nearly everyday to text about wins, losses and plays. It's a gift we all cherish.
The Most Boring Of All Games, my ass!
Once, when she fell or got sick, I don't remember, but needed extra effort, my sister popped out of the woodwork and decided that she need to talk to Mom's doctor and talk to the retirement home staff and she sent an email out to me and my brother telling us that she was going to 'get to the bottom of this'.
My sister lives (then and now) in a world where she is supreme ruler and dictates all. My brother, was (then and now) always ready to step in when needed but not one to insert himself frivolously.
So one morning on the way to the bus, I read my sister's email which pissed me off no end and then saw a reply to her from my brother which basically said 'BACK THE FUCK OFF and do it now!' Because he is he, it was kind and polite and firm and convincing. He pointed out that since I was there for Mom every single day in a very on point kind of way, her insinuating herself into the situation around me, was unneeded and unwarranted. (She backed the fuck off immediately.)
I appreciated the gesture and the note so very much. But, one part of it is the reason for this entry.
As an example of our connection, he wrote: "She and Mom watch baseball games and then discuss the results every morning in deep conversation about that most boring of all games." (My sister holds herself way above anyone who enjoys professional athletics.)
Cut to this season. His son (a rabid Red Sox fan) and I planned a baseball extravaganza here for my birthday when the Mariners played the Red Sox. My brother came, too and so, came to the games and heard our talk and enjoyed it all.
And, now, stays up late, listening to Mariner games. He even has his favorite player!
And, just like with Mom, baseball has put up well worn footpath of connection between me and my brother and his son. My brother is in Texas, my nephew is in Iowa, I'm still in Seattle. We have different lives and different loves. But we share baseball. We come together nearly everyday to text about wins, losses and plays. It's a gift we all cherish.
The Most Boring Of All Games, my ass!
(no subject)
Date: 2019-05-01 03:29 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-05-01 03:53 pm (UTC)Please don't say Kyle SeagerSpeaking of boring details, have you noticed a stark decline in the presence of Mr. Trucks, or has that just been a radio thing?
(no subject)
Date: 2019-05-01 04:05 pm (UTC)And, yep, I have not heard the annoying whine of Trucks, Trucks and More Trucks except on his stupid commercial. They are now using Tuesday night home games for mainly Dan Wilson with a few rotating players filling. It's way more better.
Still waiting and hoping, however, for Aaron to be promoted to a different timezone.
(no subject)
Date: 2019-05-01 04:18 pm (UTC)It's only a matter of time for Aaron. I can already see him working side by side with Joe Buck. Lately it's been making my throat hurt just listening to him talk. At this rate, he's going to be one of those raspy voiced announcers when he gets old. That guy starts yelling even at the most mundane bunts.
(no subject)
Date: 2019-05-01 04:18 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-05-01 05:41 pm (UTC)Connections are not made by swooping in only when the crisis hits. They're made during normal days -- in shared interests, and in daily caring and sharing.
(no subject)
Date: 2019-05-01 06:49 pm (UTC)I have a sister like yours - she's the only one of my siblings that I really dislike (an opinion shared by the others as well).
(no subject)
Date: 2019-05-01 07:12 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-05-01 06:53 pm (UTC)I don’t often comment on stories about your brother, but I have grown to admire him a lot. This story just reinforces it.
(no subject)
Date: 2019-05-01 07:10 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-05-02 01:25 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-05-02 01:28 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-05-02 07:00 am (UTC)But.
MLB games have slowed down a lot since I was a kid. Pitchers seem to only be going for the K and hitters only for the HR.
(no subject)
Date: 2019-05-02 02:29 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2019-05-02 02:38 pm (UTC)