Smoking... the part I miss the most

[susandennis]

amw mentioned something in passing this morning that reminded me of a great loss.

I was raised in the heart of tobacco, in a city who's name was most known for two brands of cigarettes. Smoking cigarettes was 'shopping local'. A pack of cigarettes was $.20.

Yeah we knew they were bad but so was coffee and bacon and thinking impure thoughts.

I smoked cheerfully and skillfully for 40 years. And now I have COPD. I don't miss the expense. A pack of cigarettes, here in Washington State is now $12. I don't miss the mess.

I miss the friends. Even in the days when we could smoke inside, smokers gathered together. Instant friends. You could light up a cigarette anywhere in the world and before it turned into a butt you had one, two or maybe a gaggle of new friends who were strangers when you first lit the flame. It was amazing and marvelous and so easy and fun.

In the early 90's I worked for the head of an IBM software lab. He had a corner office on the top (third) floor with windows overlooking the courtyard where we were still allowed to smoke. He was not a smoker. But most of us on his staff were, so several times a day we'd head out for our smoke. It killed him to be left out. When we came back, he'd grill me about what we talked about. I never broke the smokers' pact BUT I will say, we got a lot of very productive business done while he watched from the 3rd floor.

I miss the smoker friends - the close ones and the casual ones. So much. I have zero smoking regrets.

Comments

[texasts.livejournal.com]

I understand and identify with that smoking stuff.

40 years or so for me too. And the COPD. I hate being tethered to the O2 concentrator. And pulmonologist says I’ve had a minor exacerbation. I’m progressing.

[susandennis]

that truly sucks. so sorry.

[texasts.livejournal.com]

It does, but you know, I did this to myself. I hate the end result, but I'm over being angry about it. I can't change it now can I?

Things would be more tolerable if I had a little more money coming in.