Condo Drama...

[susandennis]

So I get this email today from the building manager (the one that i call thatfuckingweasel in my head).

Dear Susan,

I hope you are well and staying safe. I am reaching out to make you aware that I have received a report that someone from your balcony was witnessed spitting off the building on Tuesday, Oct. 27, 2020. I wanted to take an opportunity to kindly remind you that this behavior is considered a violation of the Rules as it is unsanitary and potentially affects others in the community. We are aware that what was received was a report so if you believe you are receiving this notice in error please let me know.

If you have any additional questions or concerns please feel free to reply all to myself and Kevin [Jathan's supevisor]. Thank you.

Warm Regards,

Jathan Hamilton
Facility Manager

Spitting???? Right. Potentially affects others in the community. But hopes I'm well and safe with warm regards.

HOLY FUCK.

I replied that there was no one in my unit on that day except me and I do not spit. I also offered him video of my terrace if he would tell me when the offense was to have occurred.

He then allowed as how the person reporting probably got the wrong location and video wasn't necessary.

HOLY FUCK.

Now, if it was the next day, Wednesday, the house cleaner was here. I love the conversation we'd have (safely over text) 'So, when you were here last week, did you do much spitting off the balcony and could you not do that ever, please?'

But, seriously, it's time for Jathan to find a new job. I'm over him.

Warm Regards,

The Non Spitter

Comments

[lenine2.livejournal.com]

I must say I got a laugh imagining you going to your balcony and spitting off of it. Maybe trying to hit the damned tree?

[susandennis]

i'm just glad i have the video cams!

[billinaction.livejournal.com]

Oh Jeez! That's so ridiculous!

[susandennis]

isn't it???

[zippybeta.livejournal.com]

Any chance it was Biggie?

[susandennis]

under some serious third degree, he admitted there might have been some hissing but NO spitting.

[carriea31.livejournal.com]

Good grief.

[adafrog.livejournal.com]

Whatever.

[gracegiver]

While I was reading this I mumbled to myself, "holy fuck" and then .... I read more.

What a weasel.

[susandennis]

right?!

[opakele.livejournal.com]

Oh my!

Spitting drama.

[terri gordon (from livejournal.com)]

OMFG, if I had got a letter like that I would have gone ballistic. I don’t know what I would have actually done in response but it wouldn’t have been pretty. I think I would have pounded on everyone’s door surrounding mine and demanded to know if it was them. Seriously. Shit like that makes me see red. I mean WTF?
Fortunately (At times unfortunately) I don’t have a balcony, but I have been accused of other things from neighbors in the past that were so ridiculous it wasn’t funny.
Clearly one of your neighbors was drunk out of their skull and either imagined it or didn’t see clearly enough to know who did do it.
Maybe it was a bird sitting on your ledge who took a shit on someone. Serve them right!

[syrsa (from livejournal.com)]

I've never seen your building manager, and don't want to... but I'm betting he's one of those wee men with a big mouth and a wee willie, that likes to shoot off his mouth to compensate for his lack of nether regions... Heard your weather is down to 45 F in the mornings.. you'll like that! Cheers and take care .. :-)

[dadi.livejournal.com]

*splorf*

[zoefruitcake.livejournal.com]

Seriously? FFS

[letmesaythis.livejournal.com]

If he had left out advising you of the policy I would have been barely ok with the note. I would insist on knowing the time of the alleged offense and would insist on sharing the video.

The proper thing for him to do would be to remind everyone in the building that spitting allegedly happened and that it's not permitted or, at worst, ask if there was any chance that someone spit off your balcony while profusely and apologetically stating things like, "I know you wouldn't do this but I'm required to ask" and then ask.

[susandennis]

You totally nailed it.

Also nailed why he works my last nerve every time. Warm Regards.

[maju01.livejournal.com]

What are those animals that spit? Are you sure one of those isn't lurking on your balcony trying to get you in trouble?

[jaywil.livejournal.com]

I have been quarantined since Mid December due to an illness and have been feeling rather sorry for myself but yesterday you brought me a good/great laugh! That Guy is such and obvious idiot. I wonder what he does for a living. Hopefully not working with people!

[susandennis]

so glad I could help!

[chocolate-frapp.livejournal.com]

oh for fuck's sakes

[picosgemeos.livejournal.com]

Any updates on the spitting mystery?

[susandennis]

Nope. But, I have not asked. It is clear that I am off the spitting hook.