Mom and Bro

Things are ok on the Mom front. Apparently when she woke up it was dark and her feet really hurt and she couldn't find the call button. It was not good. All is resolved now and she has pain medication.

My brother has now talked to all three doctors - the vein guy, the regular guy and the heart guy. Everyone is on board with more blood thinner stuff. But now they are afraid she'll fall and bleed to death in seconds. So they are going to remove the catheter and all the leads and stuff and keep her there until Monday so she can get up and around and practice.

According to my brother, she's ok with that. And my brother - who must be working on Brother Of The Year - alerted his boss before he left that he might need to stay. So he's staying until Monday for sure and maybe Tuesday if necessary.

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Plus, he's now going for extra credit. I've been using PCAnywhere for a couple of years to get to Mom's computer. It's a hog and a half and slower than christmas. I heard about a similar deal - RealVCN which is open source and looked into it but I wasn't too keen on installing it, flying home and discovering that I fucked it up.

So Bill installed it this morning on her machine and it is as advertised. It's a lean, mean, much better machine. It's funny. Bill and I have complementary computer skills. He's clueless about the stuff I know backwards and the stuff he deals with every day is like Druid magic to me.

This whole VNC thing is a great example. He uses it at work to get to his servers from his desk. So he was all over how to install it and what piece I needed. And he got the password set up but was totally flomixed by how my VNC viewer would find Mom's computer. That end was easy for me - IP address got my right in.

Then he was amazed that I was able to know Mom's IP. It actually very seldom changes but I do have a little program on her machine that sends her IP to a website every 30 mins or so and I can log on there and get it. That just blew Bill away.

He has no idea how the web works or how to build a web page but he can string together computers and make them do the two step with the admins - behind a firewall or not.

Onward and upward...

Mom and Bro

Things are ok on the Mom front. Apparently when she woke up it was dark and her feet really hurt and she couldn't find the call button. It was not good. All is resolved now and she has pain medication.

My brother has now talked to all three doctors - the vein guy, the regular guy and the heart guy. Everyone is on board with more blood thinner stuff. But now they are afraid she'll fall and bleed to death in seconds. So they are going to remove the catheter and all the leads and stuff and keep her there until Monday so she can get up and around and practice.

According to my brother, she's ok with that. And my brother - who must be working on Brother Of The Year - alerted his boss before he left that he might need to stay. So he's staying until Monday for sure and maybe Tuesday if necessary.

---

Plus, he's now going for extra credit. I've been using PCAnywhere for a couple of years to get to Mom's computer. It's a hog and a half and slower than christmas. I heard about a similar deal - RealVCN which is open source and looked into it but I wasn't too keen on installing it, flying home and discovering that I fucked it up.

So Bill installed it this morning on her machine and it is as advertised. It's a lean, mean, much better machine. It's funny. Bill and I have complementary computer skills. He's clueless about the stuff I know backwards and the stuff he deals with every day is like Druid magic to me.

This whole VNC thing is a great example. He uses it at work to get to his servers from his desk. So he was all over how to install it and what piece I needed. And he got the password set up but was totally flomixed by how my VNC viewer would find Mom's computer. That end was easy for me - IP address got my right in.

Then he was amazed that I was able to know Mom's IP. It actually very seldom changes but I do have a little program on her machine that sends her IP to a website every 30 mins or so and I can log on there and get it. That just blew Bill away.

He has no idea how the web works or how to build a web page but he can string together computers and make them do the two step with the admins - behind a firewall or not.

Onward and upward...

Check this out!

nt is the one who gets the credit here... He said I should take my camera on my walks. So this morning I walked the waterfront (the tourist end, not the industrial end that I did last week). I went down as far as the docks where the big ships come in and I thought it was funny to see this one very elegant private boat that kind of looked like a dingy next to the ocean liner.

BUT, when I got home and pulled the photo out of the camera I discovered a most wonderful photo!! I swear it did not look like this as I was standing there. This looks magical. I would have never even seen it unless I had taken the photo. This is amazing.

This may have to be a puzzle and - speaking of which - there are a lot of new puzzles in the making. Lots. Watch this space.

Check this out!

nt is the one who gets the credit here... He said I should take my camera on my walks. So this morning I walked the waterfront (the tourist end, not the industrial end that I did last week). I went down as far as the docks where the big ships come in and I thought it was funny to see this one very elegant private boat that kind of looked like a dingy next to the ocean liner.

BUT, when I got home and pulled the photo out of the camera I discovered a most wonderful photo!! I swear it did not look like this as I was standing there. This looks magical. I would have never even seen it unless I had taken the photo. This is amazing.

This may have to be a puzzle and - speaking of which - there are a lot of new puzzles in the making. Lots. Watch this space.

New Puzzles

I keep thinking I'm going to tire of working puzzles, making puzzles, puzzles, puzzles, puzzles but turns out I cannot stop. Today's additions include on by my brother, the ships from this morning and a whole Produce Section by ruralrob... And even some others.

I keep one going at all times these days - just like we used to do at home. There was always a puzzle going in the play room. But this way I never lose a piece!

New Puzzles

I keep thinking I'm going to tire of working puzzles, making puzzles, puzzles, puzzles, puzzles but turns out I cannot stop. Today's additions include on by my brother, the ships from this morning and a whole Produce Section by ruralrob... And even some others.

I keep one going at all times these days - just like we used to do at home. There was always a puzzle going in the play room. But this way I never lose a piece!

The Mom Front

Well the latest report isn't that good. Bill says Mom is pretty disoriented and keeps getting confused. She apparently walked to the bathroom but with a whole lotta help. And she's not eating. He says she's not going to be able to be on her own.

My sister has offered to come. This is a biggie. She never offers unless there is something in it for her but she has now. And, actually, she might not be a bad one to have there. She's a nosey bitch who will make the life of anyone who does not do her bidding a living hell. She's particularly menacing with medical people. As a result she makes a rather good advocate for someone who can't advocate for herself.

I actually could go but I don't want to. I hate dealing with medical stuff. I don't want to see Mom all confused. I just don't want to do it. I have my strengths and none of them get near this situation.

So... I don't know. I'm prepared for her to die. I really am. I've been working on that one for a while. I'm not prepared for her to not be able to take care of herself. I don't know how to handle that.

The Mom Front

Well the latest report isn't that good. Bill says Mom is pretty disoriented and keeps getting confused. She apparently walked to the bathroom but with a whole lotta help. And she's not eating. He says she's not going to be able to be on her own.

My sister has offered to come. This is a biggie. She never offers unless there is something in it for her but she has now. And, actually, she might not be a bad one to have there. She's a nosey bitch who will make the life of anyone who does not do her bidding a living hell. She's particularly menacing with medical people. As a result she makes a rather good advocate for someone who can't advocate for herself.

I actually could go but I don't want to. I hate dealing with medical stuff. I don't want to see Mom all confused. I just don't want to do it. I have my strengths and none of them get near this situation.

So... I don't know. I'm prepared for her to die. I really am. I've been working on that one for a while. I'm not prepared for her to not be able to take care of herself. I don't know how to handle that.

Better already

I got a lovely follow up note from my brother saying that he really thinks a lot of Mom's disassociation problems may be with the pain medication and that I am not in this alone that he is perfectly willing to carry half the load and for me not to panic yet. It was a sweet note.

Then I realized that my biggest problem was guilt. I live, by choice, 3,000 miles away. I don't have to but I want to. And I feel guilty about not being there for her.

And THEN I remembered Grandma. My mother's mom lived in a nursing home for years and years. My Mom was an only child. Grandma lived in Oklahoma. Mom lived no where near there - up and down the east coast but never closer than 1,500 miles - all those years. She did for Grandma, she went to visit, she sent us, she made sure all was fine. Grandma had picked the place while she was still in good shape and was happy there to the very end.

Mom was fine with all of it and has kind of followed the model. She has set herself up in a place that can take care of her. She doesn't expect me to so I shouldn't expect to or feel guilty about not.

So after my little meltdown, I'm all back together now and ready to deal. Thanks, everyone, for being there.

Better already

I got a lovely follow up note from my brother saying that he really thinks a lot of Mom's disassociation problems may be with the pain medication and that I am not in this alone that he is perfectly willing to carry half the load and for me not to panic yet. It was a sweet note.

Then I realized that my biggest problem was guilt. I live, by choice, 3,000 miles away. I don't have to but I want to. And I feel guilty about not being there for her.

And THEN I remembered Grandma. My mother's mom lived in a nursing home for years and years. My Mom was an only child. Grandma lived in Oklahoma. Mom lived no where near there - up and down the east coast but never closer than 1,500 miles - all those years. She did for Grandma, she went to visit, she sent us, she made sure all was fine. Grandma had picked the place while she was still in good shape and was happy there to the very end.

Mom was fine with all of it and has kind of followed the model. She has set herself up in a place that can take care of her. She doesn't expect me to so I shouldn't expect to or feel guilty about not.

So after my little meltdown, I'm all back together now and ready to deal. Thanks, everyone, for being there.